bittersweet love

it’s another night with nothing but a heavy feeling in my chest. my thoughts are swirling inside my head — remembering fleeting moments with you. your eyes are a vision for i see my future with you. it’s the bridge for our happy ending, but you chose not to walk with me and see the end of it, leaving me with no choice but to let go. oh, lover, why did you choose your ego over me?

you are an abstract art i have come to love. some will never get you for you are confusing and frustrating to understand. but i love exploring every piece of your being and admiring the beauty and loving every flaw. i was trying to unravel you, lover, why did you refuse my help and give up on us?

the little things that made me so happy are now making me sad just by remembering it. your words were once like the sweet dishes and gummy bears i'm delighted to cook and buy at the store. now it burns through me like your favorite tequila drink. why did you bring your baggage to us? oh, lover, why did you let your demons devour you?

in an alternate universe, i wish you dared to fight for us. i wish you had the patience to work things out. free your mind and listen to what your heart is saying. i wish you realized there’s only one chance in life, and you have to love all of it — the good, the bad, the ugly, and the pretty ones to fully heal and be happy. some journey is bumpy, rough, straight, and smooth, and no matter what the road we choose, it all takes us to where we are now — a grown person. following the same path as everyone else, it will be too crowded and chaotic. life always needs balance. it’s on us how we view and work things out. two people need to complement each other. if one is an overthinker, the other should be more understanding. just like how you chose the path of giving up where you could’ve kept me instead. (i've held on for too long.) and despite all of it, i still don’t want to lose you even if you’re no longer mine.

Illustration: DesignStack

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